QnA Throwing up work on first date?!? 

Dear Jen, I am a serial first dater meaning I really only have first dates. I rarely have a second. I’ve Been told I’m only focused on my career and the guys don’t think I have time to commit to love. I’ve also been told that it consumes me and I take my work with me on dates. I’m a teacher and only work 8am-3pm. Of course I do have to grade papers and so on but I really don’t think I take it on my dates. Can you give me a tip to score the second date. Haleigh

  
Hey Haleigh!! Thanks for writing! We have to fix what happens on the first date and figure out what is going on. Firstly, I haven’t had a chance to observe your first dates or any of your dates but I have an idea of what is going on. I have to say that I love teachers!  Being a teacher your are extremely selfless and put others before yourself. You are mainly security minded with friends & family being first priority. What I have observed from having many friends that are teachers as well as much feedback from men about teachers is…. You do bring your work home and on dates. Not in the sense of you are sipping a martini and grading papers but in the sense that you have a habit of not being able to turn it off and talking about your work a lot. I’ve heard from men that when they go out with teachers on dates–that the teacher constantly talks about their students. Now that is a good thing but there is a time and a place and it definitely isn’t on the first several dates. 

To turn off your work you will need to practice turning it off in your head. It will take time but you can do it!  When you are having a thought of work just say to yourself “not now but later”.  You can always chat about work with your work friends. Now by doing this I know you will score more second dates. Remember to listen more and ask him questions about himself. It’s amazing what great conversations we have when we listen more than talk. 
Xoxo

qJen

Alexa what day is it? 

Is anyone else obsessed with The amazon echo? It has a great speaker- who really needs a bose system anymore?!  For those who aren’t familiar with the Amazon echo – it is similar to Siri except designed by awesome amazon engineers. You never have to keep updating the echo because it is cloud technology and updates automatically.  I’ll say things like “Alexa play something motivational” and Alexa will play john maxwell the internationally known public speaker. Score!  I’ll say “Alexa play Broadway music. & guess what she does… She will play awesome amazon prime Broadway music. She will set a timer for you – answer questions- pretty soon you will learn how to speak echo!!  

Now does anyone know how to merge amazon accounts to the echo or add an account.. Is that possible?

FYI this was just after I got my hair done and I was selfie-ing to my parents.   

Are jansports in style?

While I was wondering around marshalls looking for some treasures in the rough I stumbled on to a whole section of Jansport backpacks. Some were tie dye– others were trendy colors and I especially liked the zebra print one! Living in seattle I’ve seen a lot of Jansport backpacks. Is this a trend or is it just seattle? Can someone let me know??? lol. Xoxo

 

QnA Banana Smasher?!

Hi Jen!  I have been dating a guy for about 6 months.  He is 2 years older than I am. I am 18 and he is 20, he is a bit more experienced than I am.  He has anger issues more now than when we first started dating.  I think he is bipolar or has some sort of disorder.  He was upset tonight that when we went to 7eleven that he got so mad at the cashier that he took his banana and threw it against the wall and said I take all these damn meds for what?  Then he stormed out and I just bursted into tears and ran into his car and stared out the window.  My question would be would this be a warning sign for more things to come?  Should I get out now or see if it was a one time instance?  Appreciate it!!! Elena

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Hey Elena!!

OMGsshhh girl!  what?  He smashed a banana??  Seriously if he is going to do that to a poor innocent banana I can’t even imagine what he could do in the future.  You are only 18- please don’t make dating angry guys or even violent men a habit because habits are hard to break!  I can’t tell you what to do but I can tell you that it is a warning sign—- HUGE RED FLAG!!  He might need to get his meds adjusted since he is screaming out that he takes all these meds.  He might need to just go back to his doctor to get his treatment adjusted.  At this time I think it is time to talk to your parents or someone you look up to and have a support system.  Remember 6 months is such a short period of time in your life!!! I know it is hard in the middle of it —like omg 6 months feels like forever.  Think to yourself- if you were to have children with this man would you want them to see him smashing a banana at 7-11 for no reason…..

xoxo

Qjen

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QnA Chronic Love!

Dear Jen, My husband has a chronic illness and it put a hindrance on our relationship.  I want to go hiking, rock climbing, paddle boarding and start to train for marathons or even triathlons!  The illness he has is Addison’s disease so it is hard on his adrenals.  It is complicated to explain.  I know you said you had Lyme disease and I’m sure you can give me a few suggestions on how to live with someone with a chronic illness. thank you!  Michele

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Hey Michele!

Thanks for writing in!! First I’m super behind on my relationship advice blog because I had a birthday & a lyme flare at the same time!! Crazy right?  So I apologize for the couple days delay.

First, I have never lived with anyone that has a chronic illness and I give you major props for marrying someone who does.  I think it is just as hard for someone who is living with someone with a chronic illness as it is for the person who lives with the disease.  I have however have lived with myself for a long time… lol.  2 tips that I could give you is…

#1 Hire help… seriously your significant other with the chronic illness can not have a successful job, be a professional house cleaner and chef at the same time.  You definitely need to hire help to support the cleaning and or cooking responsibilities.  

#2 Don’t say… You never feel well.   Well, your significant other probably doesn’t feel himself 90% of the time so just don’t say that because if it was up to us then we would feel great 90% of the time but that isn’t the reality.

Hope these 2 tips help you!!!

xoxo

QJen

Win a 30 minute Coaching Call!!

giveaway

Hey guys!! I’m giving away a free 30 minute coaching call!  

It can be about relationships or just life!

Email me at QuirkyJen101@gmail.com

On Why You would like to win this 30 minute coaching call!!!  or post it in the comments!!!

#BetterYourRelationshipsToday

xoxo

QJen

Special thank you to… Followers/Commenters/refers

ANOTHER special thank you to Beth!!  Beth has been the most active reader on the blog. 🙂

Check out Beth’s sites..

http://betulaworldpress.com
https://bethsfloraphotography.wordpress.com/

I love the photographs that Beth has!  Do you know she has a whole section on the rain?  What?!  Seriously Seattle peeps I know you are flocking there especially since we have had such little rain lately!! 

Tola has been the TOP commenter this week!! I love how you talk about Love and the prayer of Jabez!  #EnlargeOurTerritory

Check out Tola’s site —  https://tolawrites.wordpress.com

TOP referer of the week!

Thank you Stephanie for referring me!  I love how you are leading a gluten-free lifestyle & how you talk about managing a lifestyle for people with a chronic illness. 

http://nomorebandaids.org/2015/07/11/so-youre-stressed-out-i-went-to-haiti-can-i-share-something-with-you/

Birthday Bash!

WOW- I’ve spent the past several days celebrating my birthday!  I used to sulk on my birthday and not appreciate the universe giving me another year on this wonderful planet but now I’m learning to feel the joy.  Have you ever felt guilty about celebrating yourself or having fun?  I usually think wow I should really be working right now.  Someone recently said to me “Jen just feel the joy instead of rejecting it”.  Those few words were super profound for me.  Why do we feel guilt or think we don’t deserve to enjoy the moment?  This is a struggle for many people so you are not alone.  If you are one of the super fabulous people who don’t feel guilty or don’t think they should be working then you have gotten to a place where a lot of people haven’t.  So Kudos to you!!  When I begin to feel guilt or thinking about how I should be working then I just say to myself “feel the joy” and it snaps me back.

What did I do for my birthday?  I went to a Macklemore concert!!! I’m a bit obsessed with him.  I love he speaks his mind and celebrates equality.  It was actually Amazon’s 20th birthday & their concert but I pretended they were celebrating me– I mean they were right they kept saying “happy birthday”.  🙂  

I’ve been meeting some super fabulous people lately.  For 4 months I’ve been focused on making friends & now people are flocking to me to be their friend.  Pretty cool right? IMHO I’m the most amazing friend to people so why not flock to me?  

Okay so this post is a bit of me patting myself on the back. haha. But I’m feeling the joy!

Uncorked!!

This weekend I went to a wonderful festival outside of Seattle in Kirkland Washington. First of all Kirkland is gorgeous!!! If I had an extra 6m laying around I’d buy one of those homes on lake Washington. How does one get that kind of money?!?  

Anyway Kirkland is located on lake Washington. It is an upscale area that has high end boutiques, restaurants and other establishments. Every time I go there in in awe of the scenery. Lake Washington does make me nervous as it reminds me of an ocean with its intense waves. 

Back to the festival- it was wonderful and for a great cause to support animals. I especially enjoyed the cat booth where I got to purchase toys for coco and lilly. Now the temps in the Seattle area never get above 80 BUT it just so happened that this weekend it was 97 degrees. Move me back to the east coast with that heat!  Just kidding don’t move me back there.. I can’t take the humidity.  

  
    
  

Look at my farmers tan!!! Holy arm!!  
  

My first time was easier than I thought!

Since moving to seattle I made a promise to myself that I would do things differently & do activities and live the way I’ve always wanted to. Moving to a new location it is much easier to do because it pushes you out of your comfort zone. I went kayaking for the first time this week!

I was extremely nervous! When I saw a post for boating I rsvp’d yes right away. I was in and didn’t even think of the details until I got to the boat house. I had no idea if we were sailboating or canoeing. Well, we were kayaking! The person I paid to kayak said that he has never see waves like that before in the lake. The wind was whipping for sure! I was so nervous and I said I’d stay by the “shore” and not leave the dock area.

The next thing I did was sign my life away on the waiver- they even had a sign that said “25 dollars extra if we have to come rescue you”. I’m not sure if I felt insulted- like I wouldn’t be worth $25 for saving!? I even told the guy and he said gas is expensive. Lol. Okay buddy it isn’t that pricey anymore.

He then gave me a life jacket which btw I’m terrified to wear because they are always so tight on my upper area. Lol. It’s usually embarrassing when I go and put one on- like they don’t make them in bra sizes?? Anyway my new friend & I got into the kayak. Her in the back and me in the front. I was even more nervous because I like to see everything and didn’t feel as in control.

It was super wavy by the dock but we literally spent an hour hardcore kayaking and taking selfies. Lol. When I was done kayaking and returning my life jacket the guy said “how was it” and I replied “I think I’d like to go professional”. Maybe it’s just me but gliding through the lake was amazing- I felt like I was one with the waves lol. i decided that every Monday I will kayak for an hour. 🙂 I’d like to do it more than that but that’s a start.

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